


Six people Jeongguk meets in the hospital

by Jimin



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-21
Updated: 2013-08-18
Packaged: 2017-12-20 21:42:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/892212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jimin/pseuds/Jimin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After an incident in his school, Jeongguk was rushed into the hospital with a stab wound just above his hip. He doesn't remember who had stabbed him, but also doesn't, particularly mind.<br/>He keeps to himself most of the time, tries not to bother people much, but enjoys to listen to the stories his roommates tell him whenever they come.<br/>He meets six new people he never would, and Jeongguk feels thankful for that, even though most of them he'll never see again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hoseok

**Author's Note:**

> -is it to early or is the fandom ready for my crap?  
> -i'm making hoseok a bit older here than he actually is. 

Jeongguk was rushed into the hospital. His mother yelled for help, one hand still tightly pressed against his stomach. He felt the world around him shake, blur out. But just beneath the cloth his mother had put on his stomach he felt the warm blood pour out. Is he going to die?

* * *

 

The next time Jeongguk woke up he was much more alive than he thought he'd be. He was lying in a hospital bed with his mother sleeping on a chair by it. His whole body felt heavy and he could swear that the room spun around him. It was only a few moments later that he passed out again.

* * *

 

“He’s waking up.” Jeongguk heard his mother whisper out and felt her warm hands over his own. He could smell the faint scent of her favourite perfume in the air around him. It almost felt like home, but the sick scent of hospital overpowered it.

The woman stood over him, her warm eyes watering when he smiled lightly at her.

“Don’t,” she said when he tried to lift himself up on his elbows. “Your stitches might snap.”

He felt like he was about to throw up. His guts felt like jelly and his left side stung. He could feel the stitches right above his left hip, but the feeling of the cold blade in him was still lingering, even now.

“What time is it?” he asked voice so rough he could barely recognize it.

His mother pushed the cup under his chin and Jeongguk took the straw between his lips, water soon gliding down his throat.

“It just passed midnight,” she informed and returned the cup back into its original place. “I’m going to get someone to check on you.” Her hand grazed over Jeongguk’s cheek before she slipped through the doors.

Jeongguk heard sheets ruffle on the other side of the room but chose to ignore it; the patient next to him must have been sleeping. Only a moment after his mother came into the room with a young male wearing white. He had dark hair and a bright smile. Almost looked like a model.

“Hello, Jeongguk,” he said in a slightly raspy voice, “I am Jung Hoseok, your doctor. I’ll just take a quick look at your wound.” He talked slowly, as if he was giving Jeongguk time to process the words.

His hands though, were quick. His hands quickly unbuttoned Jeongguk’s shirt, just enough to be able to change the bandage on Jeongguk’s wound. His fingers were cold on Jeongguk’s skin, even through the gloves. There wasn’t enough time for Jeongguk to catch on what he was actually doing; only catching bits when he’d lift himself onto his elbows, only to be told to lie back down.

Though the examination soon ended, Hoseok wordlessly put on the new bandages and buttoned up Jeongguk’s shirt.

“You’ll be fine.” He was smiling, warm and gentle. “The knife did, though, cut through your kidney, so we’ll keep you around here for a few weeks.”

Jeongguk nodded in understanding and lifted the corner of his lips to give the man a half smile. The elder gratefully took it and stepped back. For a moment his eyes shifted over to the next bed. He smiled at the patient and walked out. He must have crashed a nurse in the hall because the moment the doors closed there was a loud thud and Hoseok was apologizing.

A small giggle came from the other bed and Jeongguk wondered what their relationship was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first chapter done, six to go.


	2. Jimin

Jeongguk wonders why his mother had left. She has been with him for the past two days without leaving and now he couldn’t find her anywhere. He felt lonely without her.

“Hi.” Came a voice from Jeongguk’s right and the teen turned his head towards it. The other patient, that has been sleeping for most part of the time Jeongguk was there, was now awake and smiling at Jeongguk.

“Hello,” he replied and bowed his head softly. The other had a pleasant face. His features were soft and his eyes seemed warm.

The other sat up and lifted himself from the bed. “Is it alright if we converse a bit?” he asked and walked towards Jeongguk’s bed, taking a seat on the chair his mother sat at. “I’m a bit bored to be honest.” His smile didn’t fade and Jeongguk wondered just how long will he smile.

Nodding his head a bit, Jeongguk allowed the stranger to sit next to him. “I’m Jeongguk,” he informed stretching his hand out to the other boy.

“Jimin,” the latter informed and took Jeongguk’s hand into a soft handshake.

Jimin seemed like a genuine person. He smiled a lot and he talked a lot. He would put up a wide grin when he’d talk about the places and things he wanted to do once he leaves the hospital. “You can’t really do much with a broken heart, you know?” he told Jeongguk after he informed him of his heart disease. He wasn’t able to live out his childhood the fullest because of his heart and now that there is a chance of getting a new one, he wanted to make sure he’d be able to love out all the things he never thought he could do.

“I always dreamt of running,” Jimin said through his laugh. “My mother would always tell me that one day I’ll be running.” He stopped and wiped the corner of his eye. “I never trusted her. I knew from when I was barely seven that I’d never be like the other children who played in the school yard and screamed as the adrenaline pumped through their veins. My heart was too slow and too weak to pump my blood even at the normal pace.”

Even with the sad stories Jimin told Jeongguk he always managed to keep a smile on his lips. He wouldn’t let himself lose it because he knew if he does there will be far less hope for him.

On the day of his operation Jimin seemed far more excited and happier than in any days before.

“It’s valentine’s day,” he said shyly as Hoseok prepared him for the operation, “I’d like a chocolate when I get back. If you don’t mind.” It was there from the first day Jeongguk saw the two interact. Jimin had a slight crush on the doctor and was far too shy to ever do anything about it. But today he felt confident, today he was getting a new life. He was finally able to live up to his age.

Hoseok’s smile was warm and the hand that he placed over Jimin’s made the younger’s ears redden. “Should I make that two?”

And there is was, the brightest smile Jeongguk has ever seen, placed upon Jimin’s lips as he pulled his covers over his head when Hoseok left the room. He was floating.

But the next time Jeongguk woke up, only his mother was in the room. She sat next to him on the chair.

“What time is it?” he asked.

She lifted her arm from her lap peeking at her watch. “It just passed two am, why?”

Jeongguk’s eyes flickered over her worried face to the empty bed next to him. Jimin’s operation should have ended by now.

“Could you bring Hoseok, please?” he asked his mother, voice cracking at the last word. It couldn’t be. No, not Jimin, just not Jimin.

His mother was quickly back, Hoseok at her side. He held his head low as he walked in.

“Where is Jimin?” Jeongguk asked and watched as the elder’s eyes tear up.

Hoseok could only swallow the tears and the lump in his throat and shake his head. “He didn’t make it.” He bit on the inside of his cheek and excused himself when he heard Jeongguk’s first sob. As much as Jimin liked Hoseok, Hoseok liked Jimin a tad bit more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> second chapter done, five to go.


	3. Taehyung

It only takes two days for the bed next to Jeongguk to get a new _owner_. But it still doesn't clear up the tension between Hoseok and Jeongguk. The elder kept on avoiding the teen in the past few days and Jeongguk could swear he heard him cry one night while he sat next to the bed, the then unwashed sheets still between his hands.

Though, if he had to choose, Jeongguk would rather spend time with Hoseok in the awkward silence than be with the new boy.

The almond haired boy was there for only a few hours, but he still managed to annoy the living thing out of Jeongguk.

“Hey, you there.” He’d call out, throwing one of his candies at Jeongguk’s bed. He kept on calling, and calling Jeongguk, kept throwing candies at him.

_Didn’t anyone tell him this was hospital?_

“Jeongguk-ah,” the other boy whined and the bed below him squeaked. “I’m Taehyung,” he murmured and tapped his way over to Jeongguk’s bed, settling on the foot of it. He taps Jeongguk’s shoulder thrice before he moves in closer to him and whispers in his ear, “Please talk to me.”

The younger jumps up at the sudden closeness and pushes Taehyung off the bed, sending him ass first onto the floor. The boy didn’t start crying, much to Jeongguk’s surprise, didn’t even whine.

“I’m sorry,” Jeongguk muttered and stretched his hand forward to help Taehyung up. The boy was light, and his hand was soft under Jeongguk’s fingers.

“Thanks,” Taehyung shyly said and dusted of his shorts. He kept his head low, and for a moment it seemed like he was ashamed.

Jeongguk sighed; he might as well be nice now that he threw the boy on the floor. “Do you want to talk?” he asked and sat up on his bed, tapping the space next to him.

Taehyung’s face instantly lighted up. He smiled at Jeongguk and practically jumped up on his bed. “Yes,” he giggled, eyes falling over Jeongguk’s, his lips curling up weirdly.

Jeongguk nodded his head towards the boy. He felt his lips curl up at the sight of the other smiling. It was surely contagious.

“Why are you here?” Jeongguk asked, his voice low, trying not to evoke anything in the other.

“They’re making some tests,” Taehyung shrugged. “Some kid in my class has swine flu and my parents freaked out. What about you?”

Jeongguk turned his head away. He could still feel the cold metal blade inside him, it was cold at first, but his flesh and his blood enveloped it and warmed it up.

“Got stabbed,” he muttered and lifted up his shirt to reveal the bandages he still had tightly enveloped around his side.

Taehyung gasped at the bandages and lightly hit Jeongguk’s shoulder. “You’re awesome,” he whispered. “Just imagine how manly the scar will look when you tell that to your girlfriend.” He had one hand wrapped around Jeongguk’s shoulder while he used his other to wave around them. He has a bright smile pressed into his lips and Jeongguk can’t help but smile too.

Taehyung likes to talk, so he does. He informs Jeongguk of all the things he’s ever done and dreams to do. His smile never fades and Jeongguk thinks that it’s Taehyung’s best feature, his bright smile.

But then, out of nowhere, Taehyung jumps off the bed and walks over to his, crouching next to his bag.

“What’s wrong?” Jeongguk asks, leaning over the bed to see what Taehyung is doing.

Taehyung whistles while his fingers fumble through his phone. He bites on his lip and quirks an eyebrow. “Do you know who Kim Seokjin is?” he asks and sits back on the foot of Jeongguk’s bed.

Jeongguk’s mouth drops. “How wouldn’t I?” he squeals. “Jin is one of my favourite singers.”

At the said words Taehyung jumps up in his place and pushes his phone right under Jeongguk’s nose. The screen is a bit too close to Jeongguk’s face, but he can recognize Taehyung’s almond coloured mop of hair and a smile plastered over his lips. But only when he leans back he recognized the other face. Kim Seokjin had his cheek pressed against Taehyung’s, a bright smile over his own lips too. He freezes; Taehyung has met one of his favourite idols.

“Cool, right?” Taehyung asks and scoots closer to Jeongguk so both of them can stare at the picture. “Ah,” he breathes out, “I can still feel his skin on mine.” His voice drifts off, memories of the meeting flooding his senses.

Jeongguk laughs at the other boy, hitting his shoulder. “You’re weird,” he mumbles, “but I like you.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> third chapter done, four to go.  
> i really suck at writing the non angsty chapters, sorry


	4. Seokjin

It feels weird seeing Taehyung cry because he has to leave the next morning. They have spent the whole night discussing Jin’s music and how sexy one of his back up dancers was, but Jeongguk could swear that Taehyung’s eyes weren’t on the girl the whole time. He seemed much more interested in Jin’s hip thrusts that hers butt rubbing.

“I’ve left you my phone number,” Taehyung mumbled, hands still tightly wrapped around Jeongguk’s shoulders. “Call me when you get out so we can go out for a coffee, or something.” He sniffled, swallowing down the tears. “Please.”

Jeongguk’s fingers threaded through Taehyung’s hair and he giggles against the other’s neck. “I will.” He hears Taehyung’s mother call him and he lets go. His smile doesn’t fade as he watches the almond haired boy walk out, tears in the corners of his eyes, but a smile securely sealed into his lips.

Jeongguk feels Hoseok’s eyes on him, but ignores them. The doctor hasn’t spoken a single word to Jeongguk ever since Valentine’s Day, and he will not be the one to talk first, not after he avoided him. It was cowardly and Hoseok should have at least told him how it happened.

“Jeongguk,” Hoseok whispered, sitting down onto the chair by Jeongguk’s side. “I want to apologi—” His words were cut off by the nurse rushing through the doors.

“We have an emergency.” She said and rushed back, not even waiting for Hoseok. The doctor lifted himself up, not sparing Jeongguk a glance.

Jeongguk dismissed it, not wanting to trouble his mind with it. Instead he leaned back into his bed and took his phone into his hand. Not only did Taehyung leave him his number, but the boy set his picture as the screensaver. His smile bright and eyes half closed.

* * *

When he woke up next time the room smelled different. A faint scent of roses filled the room. His eyes felt heavy from the medications he was still on, but they managed to find the source of the scent. A bouquet of bloody red roses laid on the counter by the other bed. On the bed that was now occupied by another stranger. This time though, Jeongguk felt a bit scared to even look at them.

The stranger was male, Jeongguk noted. His head was out of his sight, the curtain between the two beds was pulled on, shielding his head. But his hands were the reason Jeongguk was scared. The wrists were heavily bandaged. His fingers were pale, small red cuts over them too. Something about this made Jeongguk feel queasy. He didn’t like it.

The doors opened just as Jeongguk was about to pull his covers over his head and pretend the stranger wasn’t there. Hoseok walked in, a red haired woman by his side. She looked worried, her defined brows furrowed and her eye make-up running down her cheeks, small watery droplets carrying it down.

“Are you sure?” she asked, wiping away the tears with her peachy blouse sleeve. Something about her screamed comfort to Jeongguk. Maybe it was her lips that reminded Jeongguk of his mother, or her eyes that seemed so honest he couldn’t make himself look straight at them.

“I’m sorry,” Hoseok replied placing his palm against the woman’s back. It didn’t seem to give her comfort. Her sobs only grew louder until she ran out of the room, hair flowing through the air around her like fire.

Jeongguk wanted to ask what was that all about, but being in hospital teaches you that not everything is your problem. This was one of them. He had no right to poke around this.

“Oh, you’re awake.” Hoseok stood up, eyes falling onto the other sleeping boy before pulling the curtain and completely shielding his body. “I wanted to talk to you before,” he said and took the chair next to Jeongguk’s bed.

Jeongguk just merely nodded. He noticed how tired Hoseok’s eyes looked like. “If you want to apologize for the silent treatment..,” he said, sitting up and placing one of his palms over Hoseok’s. “You don’t have to. I understand.”

The elder smiled back. “Thank you,” he muttered and lifted himself up. “I have to go now. I have patients waiting.” He smiled at the younger, but the smile was so forced and made Hoseok look even more tired. Jeongguk honestly wondered how the other managed to stand on his feet while being so tired.

 

* * *

A week passed since the stranger came. The woman was there a few times. She kept the curtain between his and the strangers bed drawn and wouldn’t even spare Jeongguk a look.

She didn’t let the stranger even peak through the curtains. Didn’t let him stand up when Jeongguk could hear him ask her to help him up. She just kept on repeating, “People can’t see; they can’t see.”

* * *

“Hey,” someone called Jeongguk, his voice laced with tiredness. “You there, boy.” They called again and Jeongguk turned around, finding the curtain between the two beds pulled back, the other one smiling at him. “Could you fill up my cup?” he asked, finger pointing onto the plastic cup resting on the counter.

He jumped down and took the cup wordlessly filling it up and bringing it back to the stranger. He didn’t notice it at first, but it was obvious now when he stood so close. Jin, Kim Seokjin, the famous singer, lied on the bed next to him. His eyes hollow and his lips chapped.

Jeongguk mouth has fallen open, fingers froze on the cup.

“You alright?” Seokjin asked and waved his hand before Jeongguk’s eyes. His fingers fold around Jeongguk’s and he takes the cup before the younger spilled its content over the floor. “Please don’t have a seizure.” His voice sounded so strained, raspy even.

“No, I—” Jeongguk muttered, slipping into the chair by Seokjin’s bed. “Sorry, I’m just..,” he looked for the appropriate words. Making Seokjin uncomfortable wasn’t his intention. “I’m acquainted with your music, so I…” He allowed his voice to trail off while Seokjin drank his water.

“Thank you.” Seokjin murmured just as the doors of their room opened. The red haired woman walked in. shock on her face evident when she saw the two.

“I told you not to,” she hissed, pushing Jeongguk up from the chair and pulling the curtain back where it was. “He could sell this to the press and then you can say goodbye to your career.”

Jeongguk peeked through the curtains. “I wouldn’t.”

The woman just sighed and Seokjin gave him a small smile. “You won’t have to.”

* * *

Jeongguk spent three days thinking about Seokjin’s words. He couldn’t understand why he _won’t have to_. It bothered him. The way Seokjin looked like and his heavily bandaged wrists. There was something wrong.

“Can I ask you,” he started, jumping off his bed and pushing the curtain away, “why are—” His words got lost in his throat. Seokjin wasn’t in his bed.

Brows furrowed, the boy retreated back to his bed, wrapping the warm blanket around his body as a shiver run down his spine. Something bad was happening. Something terrible.

He tried his best to stop worrying; tried to sleep. But it was all in vain. His mind couldn’t think of anything else but Seokjin. He couldn’t stop wondering why he was here; what happened to him.

A moan, or maybe a whine, came from the bathroom sending Jeongguk off the bed, frightened. _Whimp._ He thinks while he dusts himself and climbs back onto the bed. It was probably Seokjin.

And it was.

He was locked in the bathroom the whole night. He was carried out by two medical students. Their gloves were bloody and the sheet they used to cover Seokjin’s body was soaked in blood too. He was dead, cold dead just next to Jeongguk. One of his hands fell out of the cover and Jeongguk caught the slit on the elder’s wrist before it was tucked back in.

It all made sense now; the bandages on Seokjin’s wrists, the red haired woman telling him not to talk with anyone because it could cause a scandal. It all made sense.

 

He killed himself. He killed himself right next to Jeongguk and he didn’t hear anything.

Jeongguk wanted to blame himself. He feared he was the reason why Seokjin was dead, but Hoseok’s warm words into his hair told him, “We knew he was going to kill himself. We just thought he’ll wait until he’s out.” His fingers stroked Jeongguk’s back. “I’m sorry you have to go through all this. I’ll get you a better roommate next time, I promise?”

Jeongguk eased into his touch, he was so warm. “Thank you,” he whispered into Hoseok’s chest before everything before his eyes turned black. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fourth chapter done, three to go.  
> fuck.
> 
> ok the thing behind this chapter is that i didn't want jeongguk to befriend jin, i wanted him to watch from the side just like anyone else were in the similar situation. 
> 
> hope you like it, and also this is the last time anyone dies... or not.


	5. Namjoon

Jeongguk can still see blood when he bathes. The red liquid had planted its roots between the baby blue tiles, making the hospital seem much more like a horror movie. He could see Seokjin curled up in the corner, fingers gripping onto the blade tightly, hopeful that this is the end. He could see the skin on Seokjin’s hand tear apart as the blade danced over his skin. A moan, or maybe a whine, escaped his lips as the blade went in deeper.

And then there were tears. Jeongguk’s. He couldn’t bear it. He didn’t want to either.

-

“Taehyung,” he whispered into the phone, afraid. “Could you come visit me?” his voice broke. He hadn’t slept in days, not since Seokjin left. He was afraid of what was left behind him. He was terrified to sleep knowing that he’ll dream of it.

Taehyung hesitated. “Is everything alright?” he asked, sceptic.  He didn’t know. No one really knew about what happened. They wanted the media to stay in complete darkness until the family was ready to face the world, and most importantly the fans.

Could he tell him? Could Jeongguk actually tell Taehyung that his idol was dead? No, he couldn’t crush him like that. He wasn’t supposed to; he had no right to do it. “Don’t come, I’m fine.” There was no way it was convincing. His voice cracked and he was sure Taehyung could hear he was crying. He broke the call unable to talk anymore. It was overwhelming. Everything just came crashing down on him.

A squeak of the mattress startled him. He wasn’t alone. All this time someone else was in the room.

_What if it was Seokjin?_

“Sorry,” the other said, smiling at Jeongguk while he tapped his way over the space between the beds. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” Half of his face was covered in scars, burns. “I’m Namjoon, new roommate.” His hands tapped around the space looking for the chair. “Hoseok said I should take this room. He said you need someone to talk to.” when his fingers wrap around the back of the chair he sits, eyes flickering around the room, unfocused.

Jeongguk waves his hand before the elder’s face. He doesn’t even blink.

“Great,” he spits under his breath, hoping the elder doesn’t catch it.

Namjoon laughs. His lips curl up, revealing two rows of pearly white teeth. The dimples on his cheeks make him seem so much more childlike than Jeongguk thought he was. “You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to.” His whole face is smiling, even his eyes that have finally focused on something behind Jeongguk’s shoulder. “But it helps.”

Something about Namjoon seemed so peaceful. His whole existence seemed to calm Jeongguk down. The way he talked, slowly and in the same tone; the way his lips would curl up at the ends even when he wasn’t smiling; even his flickering eyes made him seem so peaceful.

Jeongguk was shy to talk. He didn’t tell anyone he blames himself for Seokjin’s death, except for Hoseok who managed to figure it out himself. His mother only hugged him for full ten minutes, telling him it’ll all be alright.

“You’re out in only about five days. Don’t let this get you.” She looked like she could cry, but not because a man died, but because Jeongguk had to see it.

“I feel like I could have done something,” his voice was small, quiet, “like I could have said something that’ll change his mind. I feel like I am responsible for not noticing that he’s about to kill himself. I feel like I’m the one who should take the blame.”

“Don’t do that to yourself,” Namjoon whispered, fingers neatly placed over Jeongguk’s. “No one blames you for his death, don’t be the only one who does.”

Namjoon’s voice soothed Jeongguk, his words made an awful lot of sense too.

“Hoseok told me that they hospitalized Seokjin because he slashed his wrists badly. He said that the singer threatened him to do it again if they don’t let him leave the hospital. He told them they were choking him.”

The whole story behind Seokjin seemed like a movie. Jeongguk never would have thought that the cheery singer hated himself, hated his life so much he’d be able to end his life. He never thought that someone could be so miserable that they couldn’t see any other way out.

Namjoon turned his head to the doors. Anticipating. He seemed to have a better hearing than Jeongguk because the moment his lips curled up at the corners, Hoseok walked in.

The doctor’s eyes shifted quickly to Namjoon, he smiled. “Hello,” he murmured and placed both of his palms on Namjoon's shoulders.  “How are you Jeongguk?”

Jeongguk briefly nodded his head and tried to smile. “I’m good.”

Hoseok’s fingers traced a line along Namjoon’s collar and he allowed himself to rest his chin on the other’s temple. “Great, your mother signed all the papers this morning, you’re going home tomorrow.”

Jeongguk eyes lit up, he’s finally going to go home. “Taehyung,” he whispered under his breath and felt the tears in the corners of his eyes.

“What?” Hoseok questioned, moving closer to Jeongguk and taking his cheeks between his palms.

“I’ll have to tell Taehyung Seokjin died.”

The look Hoseok gave him back was compassionate, he knew oh so well how hard was it to tell someone a person they loved, admired, was dead.

“Take your time. Don’t rush into it,” Namjoon said from behind the two. “The news will be all over the news once the family agrees to make it public. Be by his side when he finds out, but don’t be the one he’ll connect with his death.”

Hoseok nodded his head and moved back to Namjoon whose fingers found Hoseok, threading his through Hoseok’s. A faint blush spread over the doctor’s cheeks.

Hoseok took in a deep breath. “Ok, you two, bed now.” He pulled Namjoon away, pushing him into his bed. “You both need rest.”

Jeongguk smiled at him. “Thank you.”

Hoseok smiled. “I’ll come back to say bye.”

**  
**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fifth chapter done, two to go.  
> i hope there's no mistakes and that this is not lame as i think it is.   
> also no deaths. that's nice.


	6. Yoongi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -updating this so quickly because i have the story complete and i don't want to keep you waiting.

Jeongguk made his way back into the hospital. It was far less cramped now, the people didn’t rush around and the smell of medicine was faint.

Room 125, right ahead of him. The handle slowly bent under his fingers and he pushed the doors in, a big mistake that was.

Hoseok was on Namjoon’s bed, kneeling just above Namjoon's crotch, his hand in the other one’s pants. Their lips were sealed together, a faint smile on both of their faces.

“Pervert,” a voice said from behind him and Jeongguk jumped up, frightened and embarrassed.

“I-I’m not--” he stuttered, closing the doors behind him and moving away from them as far as possible.

The other boy smiled at him and wrapped his free hand around Jeongguk’s shoulders. “I know, you’re Jeongguk.” He sounded tired so Jeongguk shook his head in the direction of the chairs in the hallway.

“Thank you,” the stranger said, his eyes glistening and a smile wide spread over his lips.

Jeongguk only nods his head, his eyes trailing up the other one’s face. He was completely bald, not a single hair on his face. His eyes, a deep brown colour, and his lips, a pale pink in colour that is slowly fading into white on the edges. He was beautiful, no doubt, but his illness was sucking the life out of him. 

“How do you know my name?” Jeongguk asked, thinking that would be the most polite question he could ask.

The stranger laughed. “Namjoon and Hoseok told me about you.” His smile dropped. “You had a quite rough time here, didn’t you?”

Jeongguk looked away, so the two didn’t forget him. That was pleasing to hear. He feared that they might have forgotten about him and that he’ll only come here to embarrass himself.

“I did,” he sighed and fiddled with the chocolate he held in his hands. He was about to give it to Namjoon for all that he’s help him.

“I’m Yoongi, by the way.” He smiled, stretching his hand over to Jeongguk. “Nice to meet you.”

Jeongguk took his palm in his. Yoongi’s skin was so soft, gentle. His palm was so light that he wondered if the other weighted anything at all.

“Are you in my old bed?” Jeongguk asked out of pure curiosity, his fingers slipped out of Yoongi as the other one stood up, hissing at the pain in his back as he did.

“Yeah, I am.” His fingers gripped at the IV stand so hard his knuckles were getting whiter than they already were. “Quite unfortunate that room is.”

Just as Jeongguk lifted himself up from the chair, offering his help to Yoongi, Hoseok walked out. His face flushed dark red when he saw the two waiting in front of the room.

“Hope you had fun,” Yoongi teased and walked past Hoseok into the room.

The two stood in an awkward silence for a moment. Hoseok’s cheeks were still ruddy and he did his best to avoid Jeongguk’s eyes.

“I came to see you two,” Jeongguk finally said, his fingers playing with the plastic wrap around the chocolate. “Brought you some chocolate too.” He lifted it up smiling at the other.

Hoseok cleared his throat. “Thank you.” He was about to make a pathetic excuse when his pager beeped and he gave Jeongguk an apologetic smile. “Sorry, duty calls.” He managed to mutter before sprinting down the hall.

The room didn’t change much since the last time Jeongguk was in it. The sheets were new and the flowers next to Yoongi’s bed too.

“Jeongguk?” Namjoon asked from his bed, eyes scanning over the whole room looking for the boy.

“Namjoon hyung,” Jeongguk answered and sat in the chair next to Namjoon’s bed. “How are you?”

Namjoon smiled, fingers tapping over his sheets, looking for Jeongguk’s. “I’m great. Things are much better for you too now, I suppose.” His smile was wider than Jeongguk remembered. It was brighter too.

He nodded his head briefly before answering. “Thinks are much better.”

“And Taehyung?”

Jeongguk sighed. “He’s mopping around his room ever since the news of Seokjin’s death reached him. But I don’t think he’ll be at it for long.”

“I understand nothing, who’s this Taehyung guy?” Yoongi asked, peeking over his phone.

Namjoon sighed. “He was here before me. Jeongguk and he are friends.”

Yoongi looked confused, his brows furrowed and he rolled his eyes. “You people are so complicated,” he muttered and continued tapping the screen of his phone. “Who normal makes friends in hospital?”

Namjoon laughed while Jeongguk only looked at the other with a pale face. “You did too.”

Yoongi pushed the phone away, “Not really.” His voice was dark, bitter.

Namjoon’s face darkened instantly. He furrowed his brows and stood up. “Stop that!” he yelled at the other boy. “You’re acting like a dick.”

 _Harsh,_ Jeongguk wondered what Namjoon was like when he actually got mad, this was merely frustration he’s seeing.

Yoongi turned to face him, phone long forgotten between his sheets. “Am I really?” he stood up, finger poking Namjoon’s chest. “I’m going to die in less than two months. Am I really acting like a dick for not trying to meet people now and hurt them when I die?”

Jeongguk felt his breath hitch in his throat.

“We can help you through this shit storm, Yoongi.” Namjoon tried to reason, his fingers gently wrapped around Yoongi’s.

Yoongi’s eyes twinkled, he was about to cry. “I don’t want you to…” his voice trailed off as his body was crushed between Namjoon’s hands, his head tucked under the other’s chin. “I can’t—”

Namjoon didn’t say anything; he merely just rocked the other boy in his hands. Fingers stroking over the small of his back. He looked so fragile in Namjoon’s arms, looked so small.

“Hyung,” Jeongguk whispered, half hoping that the other two didn’t hear him, but Namjoon had better hearing than anyone Jeongguk ever met. “We’re all going to die one day.” he said, fiddling with his thumbs. This was so weird, giving pep talk to someone instead of receiving one.

“Not helping,” Namjoon said though his teeth, his hands are still tightly wrapped around Yoongi who’s started crying, small droplets falling onto the other’s shirt, soaking it up.

“Just listen.” Jeongguk protested, taking a step closer to the two. “We all know that we all die, but we still make friends our whole life.”

Yoongi laughed bitterly. “But you have a whole life ahead of you, and I only have a few months.”

Jeongguk stepped even closer, his fingers slowly closing around Yoongi’s. “We don’t. I might die the second I step out of this hospital.” He wrapped his hands around Yoongi’s waist, pulling him against his chest, warming up his small body. “Make those few months you have left the best ones of your life.”

Tears escaped Yoongi’s eyes, sobs filled the room. “I-I don’t k-know—” he stuttered, fingers gripping harder and harder onto Namjoon’s shirt until his knuckles turned completely white.

“You don’t have to do anything.” Jeongguk’s voice was like honey to Yoongi’s ears. It has been so long since someone spoke to him with that much honesty in their voice. Everyone else only sugar-coated the harsh truth. “Just let us meet you and let yourself meet us.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sixth chapter done, only one to go.  
> -is it only me or my chapters getting longer. the goal for this story is to be 7k words long, i think i can do that. i hope so.  
> -hope you don't mind me making yoongi so broken.


	7. Jeongguk

Yoongi lied only a few feet away from us. He died last night. Peaceful in his sleep. Hoseok told them that his condition was rapidly getting out of control, they couldn’t do anything.

“We now say out last goodbyes to the beloved Min Yoongi, son, brother, friend.” The priest tried his best to keep it short, the rain that fell over us made it hard for people to stand in place. Yoongi’s family stood closest to the casket, his mother wept, her face buried into his father’s chest.

Taehyung’s fingers twined into Jeongguk’s. he and Yoongi got incredibly close in the short time they knew each other. The first time he even heard of the man, Yoongi yelled at him.

“Stop whining you, little ungrateful brat.” Yoongi yelled into the phone, met with small whimpers from the other side.

Jeongguk tried to take the phone away from Yoongi, but failed.

“What are you going to do?” he asked into the phone sounding so threatening both Jeongguk and Namjoon felt uncomfortable. “Cry that someone you jerked off to had died? Are you really going to do that, Kim Taehyung?! What kind of an idiot are you to not be able to realize that your _idol_ chose to die?” his words were like venom, slow one that crept under your skin and tingled. “You’re alive, cherish it fool.”

When they met in person Taehyung couldn’t help but shiver. He sounded so intimidating, so scary that the younger boy felt shocked to see a small, pale boy lying on the bed, introducing himself as “Min Yoongi, I’m sorry I yelled at you.” And he even smiled.

The tension between was obvious. Taehyung liked the elder, and the elder liked him back. It was beautiful. The lingering fingers and stolen glances and Taehyung offering himself to help Yoongi to the bathroom, and his smile when they’d walk into the room every afternoon at five. It was beautiful, as long as it lasted.

“I’m going to miss him,” Taehyung murmurs, his fingers gripping tighter at Jeongguk’s. “He was nice.” Jeongguk expected him to mourn Yoongi’s death just as loudly as he did Seokjin’s. But what happened no one could explain. Taehyung was calm. He didn’t cry when Jeongguk told him, only asked to be alone for a few hours and disappear from the town.

_“I’ll be dead soon, Taehyung,” Yoongi whispered against the other’s chest. Taehyung sucked out of his house in the middle of the night to come and meet Yoongi at the hospital. The other sounded so distressed over the phone. “I want you to be strong.” The teen’s breath hitched in his throat, his grip around Yoongi tightening. “I don’t want you to feel obligated to mourn me for years, not even days.”_

_It was weird. The two of them, they weren’t even friends, less boyfriends._

_“Promise me you won’t be that idiot that I yelled at?” Yoongi looked up, his fingers moving up to Taehyung’s neck._

_The teen’s eyes sparkled, tears filled them._

_Taehyung shook his head and pulled Yoongi up into a chaste kiss. The elder’s lips were so cold, and chapped, but Taehyung didn’t mind. He didn’t mind it because their lips fit perfectly and he wanted to stay like that forever._

Jeongguk nods curtly. “Yeah, he was.”

Hoseok was at work, Namjoon stood by the tree, his fingers wrapped around the umbrella handle so tightly his knuckles had turned white. He was crying. The interaction between him and Yoongi was always, weird. He would scold him an awful lot and would tell him he’s an idiot at least six times a day. Hoseok said they knew each other from before, but Jeongguk never got around asking.

-

The coffee shop they stopped by once Hoseok joined them was warm and cosy. Jeongguk could swear he even saw a grey fluffy cat rummaging around.

Hoseok had his fingers wrapped around Namjoon’s; he held the other one close to his chest.

“You alright?” he asked once the silence between them got unbearable.

Taehyung was lost in his mind, eyes focused on something outside the window.

“Yeah,” Jeongguk spoke, softly as if he was trying not to scare someone, himself probably. He doesn’t know why that matters, but the words simply glide down his lips. “This is the first funeral I’ve ever been to.”

Hoseok gives him a small smile. He opens his mouth intending to speak, but nothing comes out. He presses his lips into a tight think line and looks away.

Silence falls back between them. Jeongguk can feel just how weird it is.

“I need to meet my mom,” he says, finishing his drink. “She said she’ll pick me up after the funeral.”

Taehyung jumps to his feet, his eyes wide. “You’re leaving me?” he asks rather loudly. “You can’t leave me here. I—” he doesn’t know how to justify his small outburst, but instead of trying he rushes out to the street, into the pouring rain. His hands are wrapped around his head and he runs in the direction to, Jeongguk supposes, his house is. What he knows is that it’s opposite to both the cemetery and the hospital.

The three that were left behind quickly rush behind him, after paying up for their drinks. Hoseok says it’s probably a way to avoid paying up for his drink, but Jeongguk has been out with Taehyung before and the other teen paid for both of their drinks more than not.

“Let’s just find him,” Jeongguk mutters, swear under his tongue. “He can’t be far.”

Hoseok took Namjoon’s hand and guided him through the streets. It seemed like the whole thing was amusing to him.

“You’re wasting time,” he says, a small smile evident in the corner of his smile. Jeongguk is sure his eyes have already curled up into crescents beneath the sunglasses. “He’s gone to say goodbye to Yoongi. Let him be.”

Hoseok raises a brow. “You sure?”

Namjoon nods and tightens the grip on Hoseok’s palm. “Let’s just go home. Taehyung will be fine.”

The two are reluctant to leave Jeongguk alone, but the teen manages to persuade them to leave. He wonders where Taehyung might be, it’s cold and he probably got wet. He just hopes the other one doesn’t do anything stupid because he lost people already.

He lost Jimin, the incredibly sweet boy whom he thought could beat his heart, and who had the smile that could light up the whole room; especially Hoseok’s heart. He wondered how long has it actually been going on since Namjoon once mentioned him when they talked.

Seokjin wasn’t the one he wants to remember. He could still see his hands bandaged and his pained smile.

Just as abruptly as he disappeared, Taehyung ran up to Jeongguk. His breathing was heavy and his eyes were puffy. There was so much Jeongguk wanted to tell him, he wanted to ask him why he ran, but the other one cut his words. 

“Let’s go home, Jeongguk-ah.” Taehyung said, a warm smile on his lips, and intertwined their fingers. "Home," he repeated.

All Jeongguk could do was bite back the grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was editing this yesterday and i cut it drastically tbh. so you'll get a short epilogue in a few days.  
> also, hoseok is polyamourous


	8. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS THE END.

Jeongguk wonders how Jimin is, how Seokjin and Yoongi are. He wonders that in the middle of the night when his eyes don’t want to shut and his mind keeps on buzzing.

Taehyung is sleeping on the bed next to him. His eyes shut tightly, his breathing even.

He’s been forcing Jeongguk to have a sleepover for months now. The other one only agreed to shut him up.

“Stop thinking about it,” Taehyung slurs, voice laced with sleep and muffed by the pillow. “They’re fine.”

It has been like this since the funeral. Taehyung wouldn’t worry much, he only cried once and that was for the funeral, but after that he continued with his life. He even found a boyfriend. (Jeongguk thought that it was a good thing at first, but after meeting the boy he regretted ever asking. The boy was hyperactive, and loud, and… touchy.)

“But don’t you wonder where they’re right now?” Jeongguk asks, his fingers fidgeting with the sheets.

Taehyung sighs, rolls onto his back. “Yoongi’s probably ruling over hell by now.” He laughs and rolls onto his side, his face turned to Jeongguk’s. “Don’t worry.”

Jeongguk raises his brow. “How can you—” _know?_ He wants to ask but Taehyung is already snoring.

 

* * *

 

Hoseok holds his face in his hands as all the blood in his body rushes to his face.

“Happy birthday Hoseok hyung,” Namjoon, Jeongguk and Taehyung sing as he makes his way into his and Namjoon’s shared apartment.

“Why did you invite them?” Hoseok asks Namjoon once the cake’s frosting has been smeared over his face and the younger boys wished him a happy birthday.

Taehyung lifts his head from the cake he’s been eating and points an accusing finger at Jeongguk. “I told you he wanted to have birthday sex with Namjoon hyung. We shouldn’t have come.”

If Hoseok’s face could get any redder it would. “I didn’t mean it like that!” he yells desperately trying to pull himself out of this mess.

“We’re gonna have sex later,” Namjoon says from his seat next to Hoseok and wraps his hand around the other one’s waist. “Right now I just want to hang out with you guys and have a nice afternoon because we all deserved it. Especially you Jeongguk. There has been a lot of darkness surrounding you and I hope you see the light soon.”

Jeongguk smiles, ready to thank him but Taehyung is faster to reply. “I don’t know on what kind of drugs you are but I want some.”

Namjoon laughs. “It’s called love.” And his lips are soon met with Hoseok’s. They both smile into the kiss when they hear Taehyung mumble, ‘I’m telling you, they’re not sane’ before he returns all of his attention to his cake.

 

* * *

 

That night Jeongguk realizes it’s been over a year since Jimin died. His death feels a lot lighter on his chest now and he wonders will it completely disappear with time. But right now it doesn’t matter because there are fingers curling into his and he’s finally happy. He’s finally smiling widely and he’s finally content with the place he’s in.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to everyone who took time to read this, if you have any questions ask them [here](http://okanashimi.tumblr.com/ask)


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